`` IT's MY REAL LIFE JOURNEY. ;;

Monday, December 12, 2005 11:00 PM

back from bathe* dear just went h0me ...

managed to get you weii take over me. and lucky he did. was feeling damn not well* i knew he wud take over me . he was so good . corz he still got wrk in da morning and got to take over me in the nite. boy; im sorry . but thx as well . =p

saw DEE on bus* omg* so suprised . lol* she was like gong gong* and iMU. how are you guys getting ? les alr holidays ler leh . u all leh ? >.<

tue and wed nt wrking.it my relaxing day . FINALLIE. was so tired. URGH* hovering b/t wrk and studies. ONCE AGAIN. - SUCKS. thurs till mon wrking again . yup* fer sake of money . no choice. summore sumone got lost of his wrk .

im getting so lost fer this. i dun knoe wad shud i do . sumone pls tell me . i felt no one understands. all wud onlie say tt im wrong to forget abt this. but u do u knoe the feeling of hoping to be back while u feel tt u are being used ? anyone can say tt im stupid enuff to feel this way . but isnt it wad she is doing towards me ? im trying hard. it`s true . u are trying i also understand. in the 1st place when u set ur understanding ; im alr on the verge of giving up. u knoe how long ago i felt this way ? at the center pt ; she will say tt she`s trying to balancing up two fwens. but no matter wad im always the alternative ways fer her * this friendship HURTS. thx ew fer all u guys given me . im nt trying to gif up . im trying to stop my self from feeling be-ing used. i just dun like tt im always der when anyone else need but not when i need them . im nt trying to act as if im great noble freaking girl / friend. sumhow i just wished to finish my every thinking tt hovers inside my mind. wad actuallie shud i do ? tyme repeat history again and again . i got no more ways to stop all these im experiencing ; and tts why all i nid was to leave u guys alone. i knew once u guys are okie or back friends , everything wud be fine .

had been feeling freakin sucks. trying to explain to myself again and againx. pple might think tt im the one gifing up* so i shall let it be. i find it pointless repeating eventually . just say tt im a freaking one gifing up* i just dun wish to hear complaints when eithers one quarrel . and listen to how great or close u guys are . well ; u cud say im jealous ? i myself find myself jealousing too* if frendships contains jealousness , there no point. corz the balancing of tyme is nt there. ahh* wadever no pt trying to reason out . bloggie can u just tell me im freaking wuliao and stupid . this is just so freaking irony !

Joanne-
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